Deep End

Deep End by debgrant

I am of a type.

Thinker.

DIY.

Rather do it myself.

Stand on my own two feet.

I need no one.

No one needs me.

That one doesn’t feel right

Neither does the one before.

I need to think about it.

I don’t understand quickly or enough.

Feelings are hard to blueprint, to map

or dissect.

The fridge isn’t working.

I go to the limit of my stubborn independence

and then I give up.

Calling for help always feels like giving up.

I walked a line from the “pick me up” of childhood

to “I can do it myself” to

“I need help.”

Independence is an illusion.

A summit where we take a selfie

and return to earth.

My thinking is always too linear, too binary.

My feelings are more like floating

in the deep end

with a friend.

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NOTE: Flightless Bird Calendars are SOLD OUT! Over $1000. contributed to 20 charities. Thank you for your generous support. My new book called Nuevo Vino will be available in October. It is a collection of these ELOGOS poems from the past two years. More info in the coming weeks!