Keeping it Real

Keeping it Real by debgrant

I often deal with big brush strokes 
of concepts and philosophy.
Love.
That's a biggie of the bigs. 
I can say I believe in love
and it makes for a dandy social media post,
but have I always been
down in the trenches of love?
Have I thrust my exposed knees into the weeds?
I haven't done that so much. 
I have run from some righteous fights.
I have plunged in and given up.
I have questioned my ability to make a difference.
I have questioned my desire to make a difference.
What I haven't done is given up on love. 
I don't know why. I haven't been really good at it
in the trenches. 

Yesterday, I was dropping off something for a neighbor.
I passed a man wearing hospital scrubs on the phone
standing next to his car with a flat tire. 
There was nothing I could really do to help him.
On the way back, he was still there. 
Still in scrubs. Still on the phone. Still had a flat tire. 
This time I stopped.  I don't really know why. 
Perhaps it was his scrubs. 
Perhaps it was his skin color.
Perhaps it was because he was on the phone calling for help.
Perhaps it was because lug nuts are put on by machines 
these days and hard to loosen by hand. 
I couldn't loosen one if I tried.
I stopped and stumbled through the most real thing I could say. 
"I don't know what I could do to help you, but
is there something I can do for you?"
He said, "No. Help was on the way." 
I turned around, drove by him as I headed home. 
He waved me down.
He said, "I just wanted to thank you for asking."

He still had a flat tire.
Sometimes love can't fix things. 
Sometimes love can. 
Sometimes love can let us know
what's really needed
and what's real. 
I haven't given up on love.
I don't know why. 
I haven't been good in the trenches
where it gets real.
Perhaps because it is the biggie of the bigs.
Perhaps it is because
love hasn't given up on me. 

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